New Liturgical Moments: Mass Roles Renamed

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Are we not overdue for an update to the language we use to identify liturgical personnel?

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formerly: verger
now: real-time accompaniment and navigation coordinator

formerly: thurifer
now: scentologist; localized atmospheric control specialist

formerly: boat bearer
now: special effects resource manager

formerly: crucifer
now: visual effects operator

formerly: torchbearer
now: tactical illumination specialist

formerly: altar server
now: system operations attendant

formerly: master of ceremonies
now: senior worship consultant and team management specialist

formerly: celebrant
now: principal worship operator

formerly: sacristan
now: resource acquisition, maintenance and support manager

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Admittedly, it may take awhile for some of the new titles to catch on.

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P.S. - A very Happy 18th Anniversary to the good people at The New Liturgical Movement!

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ST AUGUSTINE

The truth is like a lion; you don’t have to defend it. Let it loose; it will defend itself.

JOHN DONNE

Sleep with clean hands, either kept clean all day by integrity or washed clean at night by repentance.

MARCUS AURELIUS

There is but one thing of real value - to cultivate truth and justice, and to live without anger in the midst of lying and unjust men.

MARK TWAIN

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

ARTHUR SCHOPENHAUER

All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.