WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE
I doubt not then but innocence shall make false accusation blush, and tyranny tremble at patience.
21st Century Church Furnishings And Other Stuff With Limited Appeal
 |
| Thuriferobot Mark II |
Moderate strength is shown in violence, supreme strength is shown in levity.
Gilbert K. Chesterton
- Ben Hogan Golf-themed Altar Frontal: style and... comfort?
- AI Confessional: spontaneous and comprehensive composition of penances.
- Kevlar® Cotta (could come in handy in some countries).
- Memory Foam Padded Kneelers.
- La-Z-Boy® Celebrant's Reclinable Sedile.
- Plasma Processional Torches: good for illuminating the Gospel and for welding.
- There-And-Back-Again Floor Strip Lighting: to guide communicants to receive communion and then guide them back to their pews (see also: Communion Conveyor Belt).
- Autonomous Robotic Thurifer (A.R.T.): able to produce copious amounts of smoke and operates in extreme conditions (e.g., Los Angeles Religious Education Congress).
- Communion Conveyor Belt: for slow moving communicants to board.
- Heelys Acolyte Skate Shoes: for fleet-footed altar servers.
- Temperature Controlled Chasuble: for comfort all the livelong day.
- Spill-proof Chalice: for those less dexterous communicants with a drinking problem of sorts.
- Portable Credence Table: liturgical catering trolly. Motorized version includes Bluetooth® remote control.
- Altar Heads-up Display: renders hard copy missals a thing of the past; voice command operations for page turns and instant resizing of text to assist priests with vision needs.
- Vertical Retractable Altar Rail (VeRe AltRa): lowers flush into the floor for Novus Ordo liturgies, and rises and locks into position for 1962 Missal and Divine Worship liturgies.
- Self Adjusting Stole: guaranteed to never slip off the shoulders or feel tight around the midriff.
- Airborne Acolyte: a drone for delivering altar breads and wine, lavabo bowl, ewer and towel to the celebrant; multiple accessories include Sanctus bells, aspergillum and extendable paten.
- Mandible Lector: a holographic projection that can be programmed to look and sound like the saint-of-the-day.
- Touchless Holy Water Font: no more dipping; hold your fingers under the sensor to receive a quick splash (fun fact: someone constructed this device: https://www.bbroughton.com/product/ST/hwd/holy-water-touchless-automatic-d
- Hydraulic Adjustable Pews: change the floor-to-seat height to avoid leg cramping or adjust to help little ones get a better view of the sanctuary.
- Electric Virge: provides a convincing reminder to encourage conformity among those who attempt to jump the confession or communion queue.
Popular Posts
Click on Images to Enlarge Our pastor, the Very Reverend Fr. Carl Reid, returned from the recent clergy gathering in Houston, Texas, and revealed the brand new Ordinariate Gradual. That is, the Saint Peter Gradual: The Chants of the Mass for Sundays, Solemnities, and Feasts. Apparently, the seventy or more copies of the initial run were snapped up immediately. One can easily imagine that The Gradual will become an important addition to the Ordinariate liturgical experience. It communicates a vital aspect of the Patrimony. Diocesan English-speaking Catholics may wish to enhance their (Ordinary Form) Masses by making the Proper chants ( Introit, Gradual Psalm, Offertory and Communion ) of The Gradual a central part of their liturgies. Choir directors would do well to include those chants in every Mass since they do define the distinct character of each Mass. Please see the image above to purchase copies: fstravinskas@hotmail.com. The Gradual employs moder...
Thrones, also known as Ophanim (Hebrew: אוֹפַנִּים ʼōp̄annīm), meaning “wheels,” are described in Ezekiel’s vision of the merkabah (chariot) in Ezekiel 1:15–21. These wheels are connected to Daniel 7:9, where they are called galgal , often described as “the wheels of galgallin ” in a “fiery flame” and “burning fire.” They are shown as four eye-covered wheels, each formed from two nested wheels, moving together with the winged Cherubim beneath God’s throne. The wheels move in harmony with the Cherubim. The Celestial Hierarchy of Dionysius refers to the Thrones from the Old Testament description as the Third Order of the First Sphere, the other two superior orders being the First Order, the Seraphim, and the Second Order, the Cherubim. CHAPTER VII Of the Seraphim, Cherubim and Thrones, and their first Hierarchy The name of the most glorious and exalted Thrones denotes that which is exempt from and untainted by any base and earthly thing, and the supermundane ascent up the steep. Fo...
DURANDUS | NLM Evensong is a liturgy of the Daily Office where psalms and other biblical passages are sung or said, usually close to sunset. The Latin word vesperas was rendered as aefensang by Old English speakers, and this became "evensong" in modern English. https://singtheoffice.com/ | Music companion for chanting the Office. Variable audio support available. A very useful site! Structure The office of Vespers normally includes psalms, the Magnificat , a hymn, and other prayers. By the Early Middle Ages, it became common for secular clergy to combine Vespers and Compline . By the sixteenth century, worshippers in western Europe conceived 'evensong' as Vespers and Compline performed without break. Modern Byzantine services advertised as 'vespers' often similarly conclude with Compline . Background The Anglican archbishop Thomas Cranmer created choral evensong as a component of the Book of Common Prayer (1549) during the Edwardian Reformation, drawing on t...
Screenshot | Charlotte Ordinations | CM Author Sarah Cain writes at Crisis Magazine about the naughty and knotty situation in the Diocese of Charlotte. Inspired by a recent ordination Mass, the author captures the flavour of the event as well as offering a wider perspective. Avoiding the Blackpill Temptation by Sarah Cain crisismagazine.com/opinion/avoiding-the-blackpill-temptation ... Ours is a diocese that has been the subject of an abundance of articles over the past couple of years, ever since the newly-appointed Bishop Michael Martin instituted controversial changes. The music at this weekend’s Ordination Mass was grossly inappropriate. Even that phrasing is somehow an understatement(.) (T)he bishop held up the Host weakly with one hand, as he is now known for doing. It’s a posture that is difficult to understand as anything other than indifference. Thus, the projection of such casualness is a source of pain for many faithful Catholics. A woman in a red choir robe sat in the s...
The Church recently celebrated Good Shepherd Sunday. How many were paying attention to Christ's teaching? Addressing the Jewish teachers, Jesus told aspiring leaders, or shepherds, that they had forfeited their position. John 10:25-30 Jesus answered them, “I told you, and you do not believe. The works that I do in my Father’s name, they bear witness to me; but you do not believe, because you do not belong to my sheep. My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me; and I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish, and no one shall snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all, and no one is able to snatch them out of the Father’s hand. I and the Father are one.” Those are some sobering words for clergy. Obedience in Catholic teaching is not merely “doing what you’re told.” It is a faithful, loving alignment of your will with God’s will, expressed concretely through lawful authority, especially in the forms God has establi...
AI generated image. Can there be such a thing as too much incense? Some blends might catch on. Yes? No? Maybe? The James Martin Blend ... produces a rainbow coloured cloud that induces a bacchanalian fervour in Mass-attendees. The JM Blend tends to exacerbate a misplaced sense of entitlement. The Bergoglio Blend ... is competition for The James Martin Blend, with additional negative ecumenical side-effects. The Müller Blend ... is a traditional blend known for an ability to inspire clear thinking and to expose heterodoxy. The Big Pulpit Blend ... reaches those thirsty for truth, goodness and beauty. The SSPX Blend ... is an engaging array of scents with an angry finish. The Anglicanorum Coetibus Ordinariate Blend ... is heaven on earth! The Biden Blend ... is known to induce confusion, chaos and scandal, even in small amounts. The Pelosi Blend ... is the blend of choice for Democrat funerals that tends to attract an unwanted rodent commonly associated with the bubonic plague. The Atha...
2 TIMOTHY 1:7
For God did not give us a spirit of timidity but a spirit of power and love and self-control.
POPE LEO XIV Magnifica Humanitas
Even in the darkest nights, the Lord raises up men and women who refuse to give up, who persevere in doing good, who protect the vulnerable and open pathways to reconciliation. The memory of the saints, righteous people and the oft-forgotten peacemakers, show us that grace does not magically eliminate conflict, but instead it inspires active resistance to evil and an astonishing creativity in doing good” (paragraph 211).
WORDS TO THE WHYS
Forsooth, when ignorance doth wear so bold a face, and folly struts with such unblushing pride, methinks the time hath come to cast off patience, and with a tongue that brooks no further slight, to bid these dolts depart, and find some other ear to plague with their unlettered prate!
.png)
Comments
Post a Comment
Your comments will be appreciated and posted if 1) they are on topic and 2) preserve decorum.
Stand by your word.