English Week Days Revamped

Screenshot from Happiness, a film by Steve Cutts

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e9dZQelULDk

“When asked, "Why do you always wear black?", he said, "I am mourning for my life.”

― Anton Chekhov

“A man is angry at a libel because it is false, but at a satire because it is true.”

― G. K. Chesterton

The illness:

• debilitating anxiety born of an inability to find balance between work and rest, or work and play.

Therefore... a motion:

• change the names of the days of the week to make explicit the source of people's lack of contentment... because misery loves company.*

The proposed changes to the names of the days of the week.

Someday

The original first day of the week; formerly Sunday. Nowadays, this day is anything but a day of rest. Businesses are open seven days a week, and you've been handed the early shift on Sunday morning. Work follows you home - in your laptop bag or in your head. If you propose that taking a day-off to rest and recuperate is necessary for personal well-being and the good of the family and the community, your comment may very well be met with a look of confusion or contempt. Sound principles are often lost on those addicted to unhealthy behaviour.

"Someday I might get a day off from work." That day to which some people might refer could be retirement.

Six days thou shalt do thy work, and on the seventh day thou shalt rest: that thine ox and thine ass may rest, and the son of thy handmaid, and the stranger, may be refreshed. (Exodus 23:21)

CCC2175 Sunday is expressly distinguished from the sabbath which it follows chronologically every week; for Christians its ceremonial observance replaces that of the sabbath. In Christ's Passover, Sunday fulfills the spiritual truth of the Jewish sabbath and announces man's eternal rest in God. For worship under the Law prepared for the mystery of Christ, and what was done there prefigured some aspects of Christ: Those who lived according to the old order of things have come to a new hope, no longer keeping the sabbath, but the Lord's Day, in which our life is blessed by him and by his death.

CCC2184 Just as God "rested on the seventh day from all his work which he had done," human life has a rhythm of work and rest. The institution of the Lord's Day helps everyone enjoy adequate rest and leisure to cultivate their familial, cultural, social, and religious lives.

Mundayne

The other first day of the week; formerly Monday, so named for the moon (Mōnandæg). Does anyone like Mondays? It's back-to-work day, which is weird since no one actually takes a day off from work. So, how can you return to something you've never left? (Mundayne... you get the pun.)

Consider the lilies how they grow: they toil not, they spin not; and yet I say unto you, that Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. If then God so clothe the grass, which is to day in the field, and to morrow is cast into the oven; how much more will he clothe you, O ye of little faith? And seek not ye what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink, neither be ye of doubtful mind. For all these things do the nations of the world seek after: and your Father knoweth that ye have need of these things. But rather seek ye the kingdom of God; and all these things shall be added unto you. Fear not, little flock; for it is your Father's good pleasure to give you the kingdom. (Luke 12:27-32)

Chooseday

Formerly Tuesday, named for a Norse "one-handed god associated with single combat and pledges" (WP). Chooseday is for many a day to choose the "medication" that will help you get through the remainder of the week. Many choose an extra large coffee to jump-start the brain on Mundayne. Should Chooseday be any different?

See, I have set before thee this day life and good, and death and evil; In that I command thee this day to love the Lord thy God, to walk in his ways, and to keep his commandments and his statutes and his judgments, that thou mayest live and multiply: and the Lord thy God shall bless thee in the land whither thou goest to possess it. But if thine heart turn away, so that thou wilt not hear, but shalt be drawn away, and worship other gods, and serve them; I denounce unto you this day, that ye shall surely perish, and that ye shall not prolong your days upon the land, whither thou passest over Jordan to go to possess it. I call heaven and earth to record this day against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing: therefore choose life, that both thou and thy seed may live: That thou mayest love the Lord thy God, and that thou mayest obey his voice, and that thou mayest cleave unto him: for he is thy life, and the length of thy days: that thou mayest dwell in the land which the Lord sware unto thy fathers, to Abraham, to Isaac, and to Jacob, to give them. (Deuteronomy 30:15-20)

Winceday

Also known as "hump day" because it occurs in the middle of the work week. Winceday - because you wince at the thought of having to actually look at those emails and listen to those phone calls you've ignored since Mundayne. Winceday - because you wince at the thought of that which remains for you to do before deadline.

Deadline (noun): There is only indirect evidence that the term deadline in the sense of "due date" may be connected with the use of the term in prison camps during the American Civil War, when it referred to a physical line or boundary beyond which prisoners were shot. (WP)

Our Father, Who art in heaven, hallowed be Thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. Amen. (Luke 11:2-4; Matthew 6:9-13)

Thirstday

By now - after surviving nearly a full week of ten to twelve hour days saturated with man's inhumanity toward man - you need a drink. You start your day by going online to find out when the nearest Happy Hour is happening. You also thirst for more... peace, something the world cannot give.

Peace I (Jesus) leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid. (John 14:27)

Friedday

If Thirstday was bad, Friedday is exactly that. You are fried, burned-out, beaten, worn down, ready for a day off that doesn't happen.

And the angel answered and said unto the women, Fear not ye: for I know that ye seek Jesus, which was crucified. (Matthew: 28:5)

Shudderday

You shudder at the idea that you have a mere 48 hours before you have to go back to work. The kids wake you up at 7am with demands to go to the playground, or shopping, or to be taken to a soccer or baseball game. You close your eyes and pray (halfheartedly) for rain or some other natural obstacle to leaving the house.

Even during an extended day-off covid-culture, workaholics will find a way to raise their blood pressure and undernourish their bodies, minds and spirits.

And the devil said unto him, If thou be the Son of God, command this stone that it be made bread. And Jesus answered him, saying, It is written, That man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word of God. (Luke 4:3-4)

To conclude:

“Thou hast made us for thyself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it finds its rest in thee.”

― Augustine of Hippo, Confessions

* misery loves company: found in Sophocles (c. 408 b.c.) and other ancient writers; the earliest recorded use in English was about 1349. (dictionary.com)